<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>she's got you by paperdream</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25777609">she's got you</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/paperdream/pseuds/paperdream'>paperdream</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Magnus Archives (Podcast)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, F/F, Gen, Identity Issues, Post MAG 132, local woman mad no one gets how cool her friend jon archivist is, the basira/melanie is mostly background</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 07:21:22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>805</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25777609</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/paperdream/pseuds/paperdream</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Identity is… is fuzzy, for Daisy, after coming out of the Buried.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Basira Hussain &amp; Alice "Daisy" Tonner, Basira Hussain/Melanie King, Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist &amp; Alice "Daisy" Tonner</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>100</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>she's got you</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>this is weird and not really how i intended it? Kinda a sequel to my Basira/Melanie fic Ache</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>            Identity is… is fuzzy, for Daisy, after coming out of the Buried. She didn't notice it coming back in the euphoria of being <em>free</em>, but the faint press of the Hunt on her mind returned when she left the coffin. Which leaves her trying to parse the differences between her selves, who she was and who she wanted to be going forward.</p><p>            The Daisy of now is unformed, too may questions and not enough answers. She needs to decide how to go forward before something decides for her.</p><p>            The Daisy in the Buried was mostly scared and a little bored, but she was also free of the Hunt. She didn't want it back- if she doubted her memory, Jon had her saying so on tape. That Daisy hadn't wanted anything more than to be herself without the bloodlust and sadism. That feeling is harder and harder to access.</p><p>            Daisy in the Buried hadn't been sure if there had ever been a version of herself without the Hunt. Before the Unknowing and the coffin, she'd wanted to kill Jon. The anger and hatred fueling that decision is just as inaccessible as the desire to be free of the Hunt. Jon climbed into to hell just to pull her out, when she'd been nothing but cruel to him. She'd misjudged him, and she had to make that up to him. In the Buried she'd been pathetically grateful for his presence, but with the Hunt back the gratitude is tinged with possessiveness. Jon is <em>hers, </em>now, to care for and protect, whether he knows it or not.</p><p>            Basira knew her better than anyone. Basira might be able to unravel the whole knot of identity and feelings, the way she used to unravel cases Daisy thought impossible, if Daisy just talked to her. But she can't forget the six months apart, when Basira- <em>also hers, she should have been here keeping her safe but she <strong>WASN'T</strong></em><strong>-</strong> was living her life and being hunted by monsters and grieving. She can't forget the look in Basira's eyes whenever she thinks Daisy isn't looking- pity and a bit of disappointment. She isn't strong like she used to be, and what Basira needs right now is strength. She doesn't have time to help Daisy knit herself back together.</p><p>            And there's Melanie. Daisy's return had led to the rapid acquisition of more camp beds, since apparently it wasn't safe outside the Archives any more, but it hadn't escaped her notice that Basira and Melanie had both been living in the tunnels for months, but two new camp beds had been bought. They'd been sharing one, up to now.</p><p>            She hates the surge of jealousy that the thought inspires. The level of possessiveness she feels toward Basira comes from the Hunt, she knows it does. It isn't healthy, or right. But it still burns that when Basira turned to someone for comfort, it wasn't her.</p><p>            They don't hold hands, or kiss. They don't even really go out together. A hopeful, traitorous part of her wonders if maybe they were growing apart and her return is the thing that fractured them for good. She should be happy for Basira, glad that <em>someone</em> was comforting her when Daisy couldn't.</p><p>            She could ask Jon, but she strongly suspects he doesn't even know they were together, much less their current relationship status. She can't ask Melanie- she'd seen bloodlust in her eyes, different than the Hunt but recognizable to another killer. They'd sized each other up and avoided each other ever since.</p><p>            It's pathetic, sitting or standing in the corner of Jon's office while he records because he's the only one here who still wants her. At her lowest, she almost wishes he'd never pulled her out. But Jon is always so happy to see her, to see any indication that someone actually <em>wants </em>to be around him, that the thought always dies as soon as it's born.</p><p>            She doesn't think Jon would appreciate her grimmest musings on the two of them, rejected by the rest, holing up in his office because at least they like each other. She's almost afraid that saying it would make him kick her out, probably out of some misguided sense of martyrdom, that the only person allowed to be lonely and miserable in these Archives is him, so she had best go work on repairing her relationship with Basira and making proper friends with Melanie.</p><p>            But she isn't there just because no one else will have her. For all she hated him, before, and all his manic energy, Jon's presence is calming. He doesn't expect anything from her, so she's never a disappointment. She thinks he finds her calming, too, and so she gets to feel useful, as well. Basira and Melanie can have each other, but they're fools for not wanting Jon.</p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>